The Morning After

It is rare that I find myself still thinking about a Presbytery meeting the morning after.  Presbytery meetings are mostly business, with a thin veneer of worship and community, but yesterday was different.  National Capital Presbytery gathered for our meeting, where one of the most visible and crucial issues of the past 40 years was going to be decided.  Except it wasn't, because basically it had already passed the requisite number of Presbyteries to be ratified.
For those of you who are not Presbyterian, I'm talking about amendment 14F, which changes the language in our constitutional definition of marriage from "between a man and woman" to "between two people."  A constitutional change is moved by Presbyteries, voted up or down by General Assembly (the national governing body) and then sent back to Presbyteries for ratification.  Well, the change has been ratified.  Last week I talked about the change as a whole, today I want to talk about the process and the movement of God's people in the PC(USA).
If I had to pick one word to describe the process it would be gracious.  People were actually listening to each other, and hearing each other for real.  Maybe it was because the pressure was off, and the change was pretty much already a done deal, maybe it was because in an urban/metropolitan presbytery like NCP, there really wasn't ever very much doubt that it was going to pass by a landslide (217-55-6, was the final vote if I remember correctly).
But I would like to think it's because even those who disagree now recognize that the really important thing about all this is what we do now.  Do we continue to listen to each other?  Or do we retreat into our citadels of like-mindedness?  Do we continue to seek understanding of the other? Or do we just redraw the battle lines and go at something else?  Do we live up to our bright hopes? Or do we live down to our darkest fears?
We have choices to make and directions to choose, but for the first time in a long time, I'm not waiting for the other shoe to drop.  And that is a relief.
I also had the pleasure of attending this meeting with the youngest member of our session, it was her first Presbytery meeting, and it made me proud that it pretty much illustrated the best of what we can be.  In a church where we are constantly wringing our hands about what to do about young people, I saw something with fresh eyes: let's just trot out our good side a little more often.  Let's demonstrate that we can have mature and difficult conversations without getting steamed up like a bunch of posturing teenagers.
I think we forget that most kids and young people look to adults to set an example, at our table last night we had a male and a female pastor, we had a young single woman and two middle aged married women, and we had a man who had just celebrated his 60th wedding anniversary (for those of you who are into math that makes him at least 80).  We talked about what makes for a good marriage, and we learned from each other.  We had diversity, and it was good, and it was the church, and while I may not understand all the mysteries of God, I am absolutely sure that he found nothing wrong with what we were and what we are.
Amen.