For Michele

When you love you should not say, 

"God is in my heart," but rather,

"I am in the heart of God."

And think not that you can direct the course of love,

For love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.

-Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

For most of my life, prior to meeting my wife, I profoundly disliked this day.  I figured it was simply because I was introverted and not much of a success at this thing some call dating.  Several bouts of ill-conceived romantic profligacy did not really qualify as relationships in any real sense, and to this day I consider myself rather fortunate that Michele had both the inclination and the determination to haul me out of my own clueless world and into a place where Valentines Day might actually be considered a holy day.

However, I find that after 21 Valentine's Days together, I'm still not happy with this day.  Before I was a humbug about Valentines Day because I thought it was pointless and it reminded me that I was alone.  Now I am entirely on the other end of the spectrum, because I think that Love is far too deep and holy a thing to be reduced to flowers, red hearts and chocolate.

This year, as many of my clergy friends have been noting, Valentines day falls on Ash Wednesday and for those of us that actually pay attention to such liturgical milestones this presents an almost comical contrast.  But I don't think it's actually that much of a juxtaposition, if you really understand the depth of love. "Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return," is a bracing reminder that we are mortal, and our mortality makes love all that much more salient.  I have been thinking a lot over Kahlil Gibran's meditation on love in The Prophet. I recommend reading the whole thing if you have access to it.  I will share just a bit more:

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.  Even as he is for your growth, so is he for your pruning.

Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun.  So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

Love is far too elemental a force to be adequately dealt with by Hallmark, which is why, even now, when I am happy with my love and treasure our life together, I still sort of chafe against Valentine's day.  This Valentine's Day/Ash Wednesday thing has really got me thinking, and Kahlil is taking it deep:

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure, then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing floor, into the seasonless world where you shall laugh but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears. 

Finally, there is this song that has been getting heavy rotation on my Sirius XM station called the Spectrum:  Jason Isbell and the 400 unit, If We Were Vampires. When I first heard the title I thought it might be some silly little thing about wanting to live forever and love each other, but as it turns out it is a rather poignant little folk song that asks the question: "What if time running out is a gift?"
I think it's a pretty good thing to put here for Valentine's Day/ Ash Wednesday: